Visiting my website, I’m sure you can tell that I started writing past my young self, but that doesn’t mean I don’t revel in memories, or regret some of the decisions I made back then. And because I can now look back from a distance (and those of you who are my age will totally get this), my hope is to reflect those emotions and experiences in my works of fiction and my blogs to you in an introspective, reflective, and sometimes humorous way.
You and I have had positive and negative experiences throughout our lives. Maybe someone who reads this will be young, maybe a teen. And even though it’s mainly for you that I wrote my novel, A Confederation Mystery: Victorian Town, I wanted to capture in it the essence of what defines a true friendship for all of us, what might destroy it, and if it was worth the price we paid when we turned our back against it.
I recently attended a seminar where the speaker, a professional literary agent, volunteered to read and give feedback of one-page outlines of novels. When he came to mine, as he stood at the front of the room behind a podium, I felt pretty certain he was going to understand the tension I tried to convey between my two main characters and best friends, Abby and Jess, at the thought of losing one another forever over a guy. I thought he would grasp how important a best friend is and how strong that connection can be with its facets of leaning on one another, sharing secrets, knowing each other’s thoughts completely, loyalty and love.
But he didn’t.
He told me that a young woman would easily choose a guy she liked over her best friend. Every. Time.
Right then quite a few of the women in the audience silently shook their heads in disagreement, and I knew immediately that I had touched on something. Our best friends are our anchors and we do not leave them lightly, even if we are vulnerable and lack strength.
The women in the room, mostly my age, proved that the remembrance of a bond of a best friend and the feelings we share with them, never dies. I could almost feel those women reminiscing at that moment about their own, perhaps long-ago, best friends.
We can be shattered by the loss of a best friend who has cast us aside for the sake of a romantic interest, and the hurt of that happening will never be forgotten.
If any of you has experienced this situation and has lost a best friend over a love interest, please let me know.
I would love to hear about it.